In March, during a particularly down time, I decided to take advantage of my last built in spring break and go on a road trip. I had a couple stops along the way, but ultimately, I had planned to fulfill the promise I’d been making to a good friend over and over. I was finally going to visit Raleigh.
On my way home from that trip, driving out of town felt like I was leaving my home. And that is when I promise myself that come August 15 (the end of my then lease) if I didn’t have a job in Michigan, I would move to Raleigh and figure. it. out.
Months went on, and I forgot where the fire within that goal was, got complacent, thought I was going to stay at my then job. When my job came to an end July 1, I started planning my next trip to NC. I figured I could either remind myself why this was what I wanted, or I could put the dream to rest.
On the way home from that trip, the calling was even stronger. I began endlessly and obsessively hunting for jobs in the area. Teaching myself new software to be eligible for these positions, and for the first time feeling like I had a goal and a direction, and an answer to the question “What do you want to do?”
I don’t have one dream job. I don’t have a single position that I will chase forever. But right now, I do have a city. So in 8 hours, I will begin driving 12 to go to my new home.
While I have been looking and hunting for both apartments and jobs, neither are solidified yet. I will arrive in Raleigh to stay with my Aunt and Uncle for what I keep promising will be no more than 2 weeks, in hopes that I won’t become that house guest.
I’m prepared to work small jobs. Unpaid internships, Waiting tables (which I don’t yet have any experience in), part-time pencil pushing. Anything to make ends meet and begin to make professional connections in a new city.
The reactions from this have ranged from “Well, do you have to go” to “oh my gosh, I wish I could just up and leave.” The prior coming mostly from the older generation of grandparents and worried mom’s. I’ve been told how brave, courageous, talented, independent etc. that I am in the past two weeks. I don’t know if I feel that way, but if it’s true, then I hope it inspires other people to be the same.
It just got to the point where I couldn’t come up with reasons NOT to do this. North Carolina is a what-if dream I’ve been dwelling on for nearly 8 years now. And now, without an apartment. Without a job. Without a relationship. I have very little keeping me from pursuing this.
That is not to say that I don’t have so so many amazing friendships I will be putting distance between in doing this. I’m moving away from all of my friends and family who are family and friends. But I have a calm in doing so, because I know that distance will do little to the bond I have with these people. Saying goodbye was unpleasant, but not entirely devastating.
The first two years my sister and I lived apart, were probably the two years that we leaned on, and cherished each other the most. I have no doubts in saying that my time away from Michigan will effect my friendships in similar ways.
PLUS Ya’ll better visit like you promised.
This might be the most long winded, indirect post I’ve ever written, but this is all to say, I pray that this experience becomes an amazing one. That I look back in awe of what I created with the help of my generous friends and family. And that I can build a life and a career in an unfamiliar, but vibrant and exciting town that I have dreamed about for countless nights.
I still can’t believe I’m doing this. It seems like I am suddenly living in the alternate universe where Annie is daring and challenges expectation, but I suppose now that is who I have become.
So much has changed in the last year, and I can only imagine how the trajectory will continue to change in the upcoming months.